I have been totally depressed lately. I feel pretty awful most of the time. I don't know how I am going to get through the holidays where everyone is cheerful and I am supposed to be too. I swear that I feel lonely, but when I am around Brady everything appears so negative and I end up being mean to him. I feel like not leaving my bed ever again.
I don't really want to get on more antidepressants because Medicaid is not permanent and I don't want to deal with needing meds and med management and not having insurance.
I went to the OB today. I have lost 4 lbs? Since when, yesterday? I don't get all this weight loss/gain crap. I'm not going to worry about it. I am doing my best.
I now have pain in my left front-to-back crotch bone when I stand. It feels like I have been kicked and bruised there. Its been like that for about 2 weeks. They say its the cartilage loosening up to prepare for the baby to come through. It will probably only get worse until delivery. Oh Joy.
I feel bad that I am veing so negative, but thats just how I feel.